Why Doctors Piss Me Off

So this is how the day began...

Sean and I woke up at eight am and I was completely drenched with sweat. My tshirt was soaked through and the sheets where I was laying were damp. I still felt sick from a cold I spent last weekend recovering from, and I had a doctor's appointment to go to at 9:45. I tried to convince my mom that I didn't need to go. I really just wanted to get in the shower and wash away the sweat, smoke, and fall asleep again. Sean even told her he'd stay home from work and take care of me, but they still had to see me. This was Sean's first visit to the doctor with us, and I don't think he'd be able to stand another. Regardless, him being there with me really meant a lot and made the whole process a lot easier to deal with.

I've been having these night sweats for a couple weeks now, and I've also lost about 10 pounds in two and a half weeks. I just haven't felt like eating anything.

Anyway, the people who draw my blood don't get up to the clinic until I've been waiting for 45 minutes. Then it's another hour or more until they take me back to the exam room. We wait another half hour to 45 minutes while he is with the patient before us, then he comes in and tells me that night sweats are common with Hodgkins, which they thought I had originally. (Hodgkins is a very treatable type of Lymphoma *lymphatic cancer*) and that we need to get a CT scan or an MRI immediatley. Then he says he's going to go make the appointment and ends up wandering off for forty five minutes, leaving my mom to stew and be really scared and upset that we're being told I have something ELSE. He really treated it like.. It wasn't important, by just forgetting about me. My mom is pissed, because by now, we have been there for three hours and we haven't heard from anybody in an hour. She walks out and asks the nurse if she's seen the doctor, and of coruse, no they haven't. Then she comes back and tells us that they couldn't get me in for a CT today, that I should go home and they'll make the appointment and call us.

While we're making the appointment for next week, one of the nurses in the front of the clinic gets me a CT scan THAT DAY at 3 pm, but they can't figure out what kind of contrast dye i need to have in my system before the actual scan, so they can see certain things brighter. It's this massive jumble of confusion between the nurses, the doctor and radiology and I don't even know what the fuck is going on, except that I haven't eaten since midnight the night before and it's 1pm now. I'm cranky, exhausted, and I need some pain meds, but I'm not allowed to eat anything because I'm not supposed to before a ct scan. FINALLY they tell me at 3 that I need to drink contrast dye, over two fucking hours. TWO HOURS. Of more NOT eating. Two more horus of hanging out the hospital because the assholes couldn't get their shit together. Finally I get everything done with and I got to go to Sean's hosue and rest for the rest of the night.. but I'm really getting fed up with this clinic forgetting about me and acting like I don't exist.

One of the nurses, while my mom was crying, said "You know what you need to do? Throw darts at his picture, like we do." Why don't I find a new doctor? He's the best oncologist in the vicinity. He knew the guy who discovered my disease.. And he's stubborn. He's helped me before.. He is just a huge quack and I'm really getting sick of it. It's such bullshit that they get away with treating me like complete crap everytime I'm there. It's always something with them, either they forget to let the nurse know I'm there to get checked in, so I don't get checked in for 35+ minutes, or the Dr. forgets about me, or the nurses don't care.. Especially when I'm staying inpatient or outpatient to get treatment, most of the nurses just don't give a fuck. There are two nurses who are really, really attentive and nice, but the rest are just.. ridiculous.

Update from the Hospital

Not to worry anybody, but this is the best way I can let people know what's going on with me without calling everybody. Besides, half of the people this is directed at don't read it and won't ever read it so who cares? :P

I'm sitting in the Teen Lounge at the Sacred Heart Children's Hospital..

Lately, I've been waking up just drenched with sweat. My t-shirt was soaked all the way through today when I woke up.. And I really didn't want to go to my doctor's appointment. I really just wanted to stay in Sean's bed and just sleep away the sweat so I wouldn't have to feel it. But I was convinced to go.

I guess it's a good thing I did.. Because my doctor thinks I may have Hodgkins Lymphoma now.. (again.. This is what they originally thought I had at the very beginning of all this...) I've been here since 9:45 am.. I've been getting jerked around by the doctor all day long and have spent way more time here than I actually needed to. If he had given the proper directions, I could've been done with this a long time ago. At least I get to go to Halo tonight.

I'll give a more detailed update at another time, I don't want to go into the whole thing while I"m here.. Sean is passed out on the teen lounge couch while I drink this dye crap for my CT scan and I want to put together a puzzle.